It started slowly.
Then a bit harder.
Until it poured.
I couldn’t resist.
I ran outside into the falling rain and enjoyed the feel of the cool drops falling on my skin.
There is something about being in the rain. Having it run down your face in streams until it drops off onto the ground. There is something about crying in the rain. The cool of the rain mixing and melting with the hot tears.
Usually my children join me in playing in the rain. This time the boys were down at the library checking out books. Rhianna was lying on the couch; still not feeling better. Worse, actually. She came to the window and smiled out at me. I feel bad for my kids sometimes. Their mom is so weird. I’m sure none of their friends’ moms were playing in the rain. By themselves without a child in sight.
I sat on the brick wall in my yard and just let my body soak up the rain. I was drenched at this point and sat there, pondering about life. About how things are going to work out. The next seven months are going to be intense. Between finishing up school and all the legal garbage I’m dealing with. Not to mention the house. Ugh. This house-selling thing is getting rather old.
I noticed the neighbor getting into his garage. I wasn’t sure if he saw me sitting there. As he pulled out of his garage, he rolled down his window and grinned. “Did you forget what it feels like?” I just smiled back and said “Yep. And it feels so good.”
I heard a rumble of thunder in the distance. I knew I should go in. I didn’t want to. I would rather sit out in a storm than go in. I knew I had to be safe and go in.
Then there was that scent that has been absent for so long. The smell of earth. Fresh, clean, newly awakened earth. I breathed in deeply; still hearing the distant roll of thunder. Knowing I should go in.
But still I sat and enjoyed the freshness of the rain.
Eventually I did break the spell and went inside.