Thursday, January 23, 2014

I loved you first

I have a sweet little brown eyed boy who gets up (almost) every night with a good excuse.

Sometimes its a tummy ache.

Sometimes its an itchy back.

One night it was "I don't know if I'm hot or cold but I can't sleep"

What he really needs is rocked.

But at a grown up age of 8, how could he admit that?

Tonight was no different.

I snuggled him and we rocked a little.

Knowing that the morning will bring a grumpy little boy who doesn't want to get up.

But I only get a few nights each week to put him to bed so I don't care what my mornings are like.

Tonight we had our usual talk.

"You know I love you, don't you?"

"Yea, Mama.  I love you too."

"But I love you more."

"No.way.  I love you more."

"But I loved you first"

"Nope. I loved you first. When I was in your tummy."

"But I loved you right when I knew you were in my tummy...before you even had a brain to love me with."


"I loved you when I was in heaven, before you knew I was coming"

"Oh sweet little boy."

I was a bad mom then and made him a second snack.

I know its 11 pm.

I know that tomorrow morning will be hard to get him up.

I'm know all the parenting books say that I'm all wrong in allowing him to manipulate me.

Those books can go read themselves.

Because maybe its not entirely about a little boy needed snuggled.

Maybe its about the mom needing it more.

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